Jared: (hugs me) When I’m a dad, I want you to be my wife.
Me: (melting) Ok, but what about dad? Who would be his wife then?
Jared: He could just find a new wife.
Me: You won’t want me as a wife by then anyway. I’ll be old and wrinkly.
He just smiled.
When we were kids, well probably closer to teenagers, we were traveling in the car together as a family. I’m probably wrong, but I envision that we were somewhere between California and New York on one of our annual cross country road trips where all the best memories are made. We took to traveling car games and often read the passing signs. Shannon read one once that she will never live down… A sign that read Army Supplies.
Shannon asked, “Mom? What are army… sooplies?” Supplies Shannon, I remember my mother saying through a giggle. The word supplies has always been connected to that silly little memory. Not too long ago I heard this from my 7 year old daughter, Lainy was reading the words written on one of my spray bottles. "Sally beauty supply" But she read it, "Sally booty sooplee. Mom? What are booty sooplees?"
I have mixed feelings about whether or not every parent should feel the way I felt this afternoon.
Lainy and Jared ride scooters outside on a regular basis. We live on a quiet street and I just keep the door open to listen for them. Today was no different. Well, yes it was. Today I lost and found Lainy. I came out to Jared telling me that he couldn’t find Lainy. He said she had crossed the street to pet a dog. She isn’t allowed to cross the street. Red flag. He said she followed it. RED FLAG. He said it was a dad with the dog. At that point I was a wild screaming desperate mother running and yelling my sweet girls name. I called 911 immediately. They ask you seemingly simple questions. But when you have to tell a 911 operator that your daughter has blonde hair blue eyes and what she is wearing, it is the most terrifying feeling I have EVER felt in all of my existence. Jayce took off on his bike to scope the closest streets. He found her around the corner and down the street. She was petting a cat.
10 minutes.
She was only gone 10 minutes and it changed me forever. The police came in record time just to make sure all was well. He said that there were 30 units en route before we had found her. My sweet baby. All 3 of my children came into Lainy’s room while their very emotionally charged mother said words that I am sure they will forget. But I am sure none of us will forget the feeling we had as we all cried and hugged together in realization of what could have been. I am immensely grateful for the outcome. I am grateful that I could learn this lesson without losing my Lainy for longer than 10 minutes.
When we were first married and had moved out here to AZ we lived near my sister Shannon and her family. We had gone to a meeting together about how to start, store, and utilize a year supply of food. It was a lot of info and my head was swimming. I felt excited, anxious, and overwhelmed. I had a small stack of papers in my hand and I knew they would be useful at some point. Shannon gave me my very first nugget of info for doing something with all of that information… She said, start a food storage file. Stick those papers in it, it will grow. Now, 10 years later as I have pulled that file out of its place countless times, I remembered what she had said. And that file has grown. It’s a nice big fat file of beautiful information.
Many of you have heard, or know that Mormons have a goal to store a year supply of food. It’s quite a task! In fact, it took me 5 years to even begin because there were so many different ways of planning for it. Plan by pounds (get 400 lbs. of wheat, get 100 lbs. of corn meal, 150 lbs. of sugar, etc.) plan by meal, (get everything you need for a spaghetti meal and multiply it by 52.) And then somewhere in between. Then you have your 72 hour kits, your water supply, toiletries, medicines… the list goes on.
I am at a point in my life where I just get what I can, when I can. Sometimes I get ambitious and I organize and plan, roll with it for a while, and then I scrap that plan and try something else! But, I am getting somewhere.
Now we have been married for 10 years, I still have my food storage file of information, and I still feel excited, anxious, and overwhelmed by food storage. It is one of my 2012 goals to get a concrete plan to continue storing and using my year supply.
“Remember, a year’s supply is not so much a matter of dollars and cents as it is of faith and obedience.” - Unknown
***Lainy’s birthday post quite a bit late!
Lainy turned 7!! She started piano lessons nearly a year ago and sits at the keys every time she passes by. She sings every chance she gets. I had to remind her that the whole congregation could hear her continuing to sing after they had finished the song. Lainy speaks her mind whether you would prefer her to or not. For example: I asked her if she knew if her teacher drank coffee so I could get her a gift card. She said yes. I said, are you sure? Her reply, “Yes, I was talking to her and I smelled her breath and said, ‘ew! You’re breath stinks!’ She said it was her coffee.” Lainy adores her brothers. And is a great balance between a big brother who likes to be in control, and a soft spoken little brother. If there is an adult around who even remotely tolerates her, she is quite literally a magnet. Tucked up under their arm, or plopped right on their lap if they let her. She has been that way since she could make a decision to like or dislike someone. Actually, she likes everyone. Except the scary lady with the giant black drawn-on eyebrows and witch voice we saw at Fuddruckers when she was only a baby… she did not like her. But other than that, she can find something she loves in just about everyone. She let’s me yank,twist, and twirl her pretty blonde hair into any fashion I choose. She is my sweet little princess and I am grateful for the gift of being her mother. Love you Lainer.
Some of our traditions have started and ended or phased out, and some that we never planned have stuck around. I love our traditions and the memories that come with them. If I can remember to see through the craziness of the season, and enjoy the time spent with family and friends it really is the best time of the year.
I finished reading the Book of Mormon in 30 days earlier this month. Boy, did I need it. A woman teaching an auxiliary training meeting mentioned that she had taken a BoM 30 day reading challenge and that if we felt like we needed a kick start spiritually, she recommended it. If I ever needed a kick start, it was then. Did I have life changing visions, or answers to questions I had had for years? No. Did I feel as though I could move mountains or part seas? No. Here’s what I did have; A clearer view of what my blessings were. A strengthened relationship with my Savior. I hit my knees more often in those 30 days then I can ever remember doing in my 32 years of life. Life was as filled with trials and craziness as it was before I began. None of that changed. It was my perspective that changed. I mentioned to my sister more than once that life just felt richer. I am grateful for that holy book. I am grateful for those who were faithful enough to do what was needed to allow me to have those words in my home. I am grateful for my Savior and for this season to be constantly reminded of His birth and the life He lead and gave for me.
Merry Christmas!
Jared has taken to talking quite often about fighting bad guys. And letting me know what he will do to them if they come around. Today was quite a bit more interesting than the typical, beat ‘em up business. He mentioned he would kick him where it counts and I hadn’t been paying attention so I asked whom he was referring to. A bad guy. I told him he was too young to fight bad guys. He said, maybe when he’s 10. I told him he probably should wait until he is a daddy’s age to worry about that kind of thing. Silence. But mom, I have the scripture Power. (this is a song they learn in primary) And mom, I am growing a bump on my arm. Jayce has a bump on his arm too, to fight bad guys.
Later this afternoon he began talking about how much I like him, (and I do!) and that for that very reason had he been born. He said that we liked him so much, we liked him into this world. So I asked him how he thought babies did get here. Well, first um, it’s a tiny brain. Then it um, grows into a really big brain. Then it um, goes as a really tiny rainbow, then it gets to um, a really big rainbow (hands rainbowing through the air) and then it makes a tiny baby and it grows and grows.
I love this boy.
On the way home from a trip to the visitors center with the kids, we were discussing why it was nice to spend some time walking around the temple grounds and in the visitors center, how the temple is the closest place on earth we can get to our Heavenly Father and Jesus. We talked about how we can pray for those we love or about something we are struggling with while we are there. So, on the ride home it was pretty quiet until Lainy started chattering and Jared whipped head toward her and said, “Hey! I’m trying to talk to Jesus!” A few minutes later Lainy was reading the back of her card she had gotten from one of the women at the temple and teaching Jared some of the Articles of Faith. She is still sounding out bigger words…
Lainy: Ok, Jared repeat after me.
Jared: ok
Lainy: We believe
Jared: We believe
Lainy: in
Jared: in
Lainy: God the…
Jared: God the…
Lainy: International Father
Shelley’s house is 13.9 miles from mine. I have traveled it all too often in the past 24 hours…
Went yesterday to help set up for the party.
Went again later that night for the actual party.
Went tonight to pick up Jason’s phone that we left at the party.
Made Jason go back again when I realized I had left MY phone while we were picking up Jason’s phone…
If you haven’t seen this aired on MSNBC, please take the time to read This article. I openly wept and said a silent prayer of thanks for the hearts of all those involved in helping this man and his family to change his and so many others lives. I couldn’t help but think that Satan had a solid moment of foot stamping and fist shaking when this man left his army of hatred…
I was relatively excited for Halloween this year. All 3 kids are old enough to walk, talk and carry their own candy. Jared decided 2 months ago to be Ironman, and never once wavered. Easy store bought. Done. Lainy begged pleaded and whined to be Rapunzel. I rolled it around in my brain for a solid week and convinced her to be a fairy. Her aunt Shelley had made a beautiful tutu that was begging for public use. So, I figured I would whip up a little sparkly top and wings in a jiffy. A jiffy it was not. Though they turned out pretty cute. Jayce bounced ideas around until he settled on being a trash can. Not sure where the idea came from, but I couldn't talk him out of it.
Friday night was the party for church, which was pretty awesome. Dinner, games and trunk or treating. Jayce’s costume was not “running around” friendly so he ditched it near a table. I guess it was inevitable that someone opened it and dumped a half eaten plate of chili in it… A little rinse with a hose and he was back in business.
This afternoon was school parties, and I was blessed by the assignment of overseeing an hour and a half of first graders bowling. Over and over again. My ab and thigh muscles will thank me in the morning I am sure.
And this evening. Trick or treating. The anticipation had dwindled a bit with Halloween being drawn out 3 or 4 days. Costumes were itchy, heavy, or sweaty. They lasted an hour. I carried the trash can, ironman mask, and fairy wings home. Though the trash can was definitely a crowd favorite. They didn’t even want to hit the houses on the way back home. Just wanted to get home.
So that wraps up Halloween 2011. We did miss our traditional annual trip to Grama Jet’s this year… 
HAPPY HALLOWEEN!
Whenever I take a moment to reminisce and think about where life has taken me, I almost never feel a desire to relive a phase. Definitely do not want to repeat the teenage years. Loved dating, but man am I glad that’s over. Love love loved my kids in baby phase, and many moments have passed when I wish I could go back to that one. I enjoy where I am at. I don’t even mind the wrinkles beginning. I have always thought of aging as sort of a trophy. That I had earned every single line, scar, and stretch mark. But today… today I’m not so optimistic. Today I found white hair sprouting from my head. What? What is this? I’m a hair dresser! Doesn’t that make me exempt? This will not be handled with grace.
I’ve had a few (dozen) whiny moments in the past year mostly about my living and financial circumstances. I am aware that I am human and to have these imperfect and ungrateful thoughts is within the normal parameters of a carnal minded being. But I have been meaning to write down some of the miracles that have taken place as well.
With Jason being in school full time there have been some roadblocks in the process. Let me see if I can explain. Jason has a brain unlike most. (definitely unlike mine) It’s like a magnet, stuff just sticks in it. On an average day when a person thinks of something interesting (why do so many have a fear of clowns? or Are dogs mouths really cleaner than humans?) and we wonder about it for a minute and move on. Jason actually follows through with every thought left unanswered. (I’m getting off topic here) Ok, so Jason doesn’t learn in a typical fashion. He struggles learning in lecture form. He needs application and to be given the info and allowed to manipulate it in his mind his own way in order to internalize it. It makes college hard.
Last semester things had gotten so difficult that we made the decision that if he didn’t pass his Calculus 3 class, we would close this chapter of school and he would go back into the work force. He put everything he had into that class. Tutor center everyday, study every night. He did well the whole semester until his final. Which he bombed. Tests seem to eat him for dinner. So, that night we started looking for jobs. We were sad and frustrated after years of prayer and fasting and knowing school was the answer. We had a huge mountain in front of us with no clear way to pass.
We had forgotten that mountains can be moved.
That night, the instructor for the class sent him a long email giving him both praise and constructive criticism. He had made the decision to disregard his final grade and gave him a passing grade. He wanted him to continue on with his schooling. Financial aid came through that very evening and we felt an overwhelming confirmation that we were doing what we should be.
My sisters and I took a trip out to Cerreta’s Candy Company this afternoon. Jared is not my most expressive child as you will see in the pictures…
First we met our tour guide (I say that very loosely). She introduced herself as Candy, and went on to explain that it was family owned and run. I couldn’t help it. “Candy? For real?” For real. She is the owners granddaughter. Awesome.
We did a very fast tour of a couple of the conveyer belts of choc covered pretzels and… yup just the pretzels. Quick tour. We did get 2 or 3 samples. Jared spit just about everything into the trash. I however, did not.
Then Jared and Carter made their own little chocolate pizza.
Carter was thrilled about it ALL. So cute.
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Jared was not your average kid in a candy store. Quite melancholy for most of it. This Santa was 5 feet and solid chocolate. That’s the kind of Santa I can believe in.
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In this photo Jared has a mouthful he is waiting to spit out. Is this my kid?? And then making the pizzas with Candy the tour guide.
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I’m having a hard time looking forward to the joyous occasion of birthdays these days. Especially this week. For a single reason. I’m just not ready for them to get any older. Up until this year I was so excited for the milestones and the passing of phases.
All 3 children are onto the next phase in childhood and I’m not ready. Because what also comes with all of those very convenient comforts of growth are:
My little Jared turned 5 last week and I was not happy about it. I asked him if he would mind repeating his fourth year of life. He thought long and hard for a full second before declining. Sigh. I love you my tiny person. Happy Birthday!
On various occasions Jared actually does speak, and when he does….
1. Jared to Grammy: Grammy I am your best… your best… your best cousin right?
2. Jared to Me: (Wrapping his arms tight around me) Mom, I am your best husband.
3. After dropping kids off at school…
Jared: It’s just you and me right mom?
Me: Carter is coming over today.
J: Yay! And Andrew?
Me: Andrew is at school, but Mingy is coming too.
J: Oh yay! I love Carter, and Ming is so cute! She has little buck teeth. Little tiny baby buck teeth. She is cute cute cute. Little baby buck teeth, sooo cute, baby tiny buck teeth…
Can you tape these to our faces mom?
Um sure.
(Deep breathing into bowls) It’s just like if we were in space!
And later… Jayce: “Hey! This is what we should’ve done when the whole house stunk!”
This trip was memorable at the very least.
We started out our journey stopping in Utah and staying overnight with our dear friends the Merritt's. Thank you for opening your home to us! We miss you! (forgot to take pictures. Grrr)
Then had lunch with a couple of Jason’s high schools friends. (Again, no pictures. I got the hang of it eventually)
Stopped at Shannon’s for a few days.
Had a grand time zipping around her little Pleasantville neighborhood on quads, trampoline jumping, marshmallow roasting, airsoft warring, target shooting, item blow up-ing, ping ponging, pool table-ing, and enjoying one another's company. Thanks for the memories Poppleton Fam!
Then we headed up to Washington. I think THIS is where I started going down hill…
Montana’s 50,000 silver dollar joint. I’m not keen on the place. We had stopped there on previous trips and I wasn’t super thrilled about swinging in again. I became monster mama and developed a 3 year old attitude of I hate this place and how soon can we leave.
Our first stop was Jake and Kyra's, church with them, and then a few hours up north to his mom’s. It is definitely off the beaten path. The forest was gorgeous. My kids had the time of their lives. It is well known (my whining was inescapable) that I am not a huge fan of camping. So I struggled a bit huge amount. The days went like this: tents, hiking, swimming, creek wandering, kitten hording, outdoor shower taking, out housing, bow and arrowing, hammocking, tree climbing, mallow roasting, and all around running amuck. Love you Chad and Lynnette! Thank you!!
Well into week 2 of our vacation, and we headed out to his dad’s place for the family reunion. (I snuck 2 days of a hotel in, as a buffer between me and crazy.) Joe’s was great. The kids (and Joe!) went down the creek one afternoon, we spent a day in the church gym playing volleyball, and death by rubber ball dodgeball. I did some hair on the lawn. Kids ran through sprinklers, had meetings in their clubhouse, were told they couldn’t marry their cousins, and played lots of Legos. Lainy and 5 year old cousin Aaron, had an immediate friendship. He told her he was 8 so she would like him, though he could have been 3 and the color green and she would still adore him. And then the boys decided there was no better send off for us than to blow up a dryer.
Thanks for the memories Stolworthy family!
The journey didn’t end there… We (Jason) drove straight through 24 hours and came home to a washer than had flooded the night before we left (thank goodness!), a water heater that exploded and a fridge that had died a week into our vacation. I cried. And then I took my already packed car and went to my sisters.
You know Marlin, at the beginning of Finding Nemo, how he keeps trying to tell that same joke and just can’t seem to get it right? But he knows that deep down he really has the potential to be funny? And then when he’s looking for Nemo, and comes across this school of fish and they say, “blah blah blah blee blee blee- Mr. Bossy”?
That is my Jayce. He turned 9 yesterday. And I LOVE being around him. He has finally learned how to tell jokes that make the whole room laugh, and knows how to laugh at himself.
He has more self assurance than even I have at age 31. (Case in point- see wristbands in picture below) One day I came to pick him up from school and he had his shirt tucked way into his shorts, and his shorts hiked up. I told him he looked like a dork. He told me he didn’t care, that he liked ‘em.
I LOVE THAT.
If you’re going to do something, do it because you want to. As far as Mr. Bossy goes... He is and probably always will be bossy in some form. I’m cool with that.
Happy Birthday Bug, I love you!!
About a year ago was when I realized what it meant. Jared would come up at random moments and just blow in my face. It was a bit of a nuisance for a while, until one day I realized the timing wasn’t random. It was very well planned. Jared says I love you by blowing at you. It has become one of my most cherished attributes of him. He will come up and hug my legs and I respond with a smile and he will look up and blow at me. Anytime he feels the need to show affection I get a smile followed by some Jared breath. I love you isn’t something that escapes his lips very often. At least audibly. But he knows that I know what it means when he blows in my direction.
Oh how I love that boy.
A mom post isn’t typically written in June. But I had a little inner prickly that I needed to get on paper. Summer has thrown all planned organized thoughts and actions clean through our newly broken window. (A story for another day) It makes for a lazy mama. Which also makes for a mom who has those little heart strings tugged. I am home with my kids all day everyday and yet I feel as though I haven’t seen them. We watch TV, play video games, I work, and clean… but when a tiny person comes and looks up at me with that look on his face that says I love you, I need you and I want a kiss, all without words, I want nothing more than to rewind and spend every waking moment making memories instead of letting them be swallowed by mindless media. My babies will only be babies once. I just want to look back and know that I loved them enough.
I had girls camp the week leading up to Father’s Day this year so it was a very low key day for Jason. Primary leaders at church had a questionnaire printed with all of the kids answers….
What is your dad’s fav food?
Jayce: Pizza
Lainy: Ice cream
Jared: Broccoli
Who does your dad want to be like someday?
Jayce: A Dad
Lainy: A police officer
Jared: His self
Other good ones: someone with a shorter job, Larry Fitzgerald, Chuck Norris, Batman, border patrol, a pet helper at the zoo, Justin Bieber, like Noah.
What is your dad’s shoe size?
Jayce: 15
Lainy: 60
Jared: 15 feet
Other good ones: big, giant, 70 feet, this big.
If your dad could wish for one thing, what would it be?
Jayce: XBOX 360
Lainy: An IPod touch
Jared: to work again
Other good ones: Someone would do his work for him, to be taller, older sisters to not be terrors, a star, to never send me to my room, to runaway, to play like a T-rex.
Who is your dad’s best friend?
Jayce: Heavenly Father and my mom
Lainy: Uncle Jess
Jared: He doesn’t have one
What do you like to do with your dad?
Jayce: Play Basketball
Lainy: Eat pizza with him at Red Robin (I don’t even think RR has pizza…)
Jared: Play with him
Other good ones: Play Barbie's
What is your dad’s favorite thing to do in his free time?
Jayce: Play video games
Lainy: Watch movies
Jared: Work
Other good ones: Go to bed, fold his arms, take naps, well…nothing, play ,play ,play, hunt for mean pigs,
How tall is your dad?
Jayce: 8 feet
Lainy: 50 feet
Jared: 2 inches
Other good ones: Medium, Giant, Almost as tall as my mom, 9 inches, I’m thinking like 8,9, or 10.
This is Marta.
When I was 21 and in beauty school I did a LOT of pedicures. I had my own mini clientele. Marta and her friends came every month. I knew the first time I met her that her and I had harmonious spirits. We laughed and talked and worked on those callused feet! I finished beauty school and as life took me here and there, Marta was always there with me. She has been a comfort, a confidant and friend to me all these years. She is a brilliant artist, quite a comedian (even when she hasn’t intended to be!) and has a fine tuned listening ear. Marta often comes bearing gifts: wind chimes, treats, and even sweet letters in the mail. She has brought me many plants over the years. I killed the majority of them. (She started bringing my seeds after I killed half a dozen lantana, the said-to-be unkillable plant) I credit her for my ability to keep house plants alive today via trial and error. She brings books and love to my children, and they adore her. I feel privileged to know her and call her my friend. Love you Marta!
