Doubt vs Question

Doubt is defined as "expressing or feeling uncertainty or lack of conviction; skeptical"
Questioning is defined as "the action of someone asking questions"

So many times has this idea of doubt vs questioning come up in discussion of religion.  Many times I have heard that doubting is bad, but questioning is ok.  I'm not sure that I can get on board with that.  I didn't spend any of my youth asking questions, I don't even remember spending any of my valuable teenage time considering any of it.  It didn't occur to me.  I was trying to keep the emotional roller coaster of youth on the tracks.  Sure, I went to church camps, educational religious events, and I learned and grew from them, but I don't remember really wondering if there was truth in it.  It just was what I knew.  In my 20's while a newlywed and having babies, I still attended church, listened and felt filled by the lessons taught and the lessons I was asked to prepare and teach.  It was my 30's that I finally began to consider God and religion as more than just something that I did.  So, I began to question.

For quite a few years I questioned off and on.  Mostly I was frustrated by the roles of women in the church, or the lack of it.  I struggled with the concept of polygamy, some of the early prophets and their imperfections, and little things that popped up every now and then.  But I never doubted.  I questioned.

Before several of my family members chose to leave the church, they spent a great deal of time and energy asking every question imaginable.  As those questions because to accumulate, doubt began to creep in.  I questioned and began to doubt as well.  And you know what?  That ok.  Doubting does not make any of us bad people.  It means we are human and imperfect, and we are using our gift of agency and choice, and isn't that fantastic! Isn't it ok to wonder and worry and panic when things start to feel shaky underneath our usually stable ground?  I think yes. I have been on my share of shaky ground having been raised in Southern California and it is a scary feeling to have ground beneath you move. And just as an earthquake shakes things up, eventually time continues and the ground stops shaking. You assess the damage, and start moving forward again.  I think when we spend so much time trying to remind others that doubt is scary and wrong we are misunderstanding the purpose of learning.

It's scary to watch someone we love make choices that are different than ours, especially if we know we have the truth.  Sorry to break it to you, but you can't make anyone's choices for them.  You can provide love, information, share your testimony and be an example, but you can't choose for them.  Most of us have somewhere between 75-85 years on average, to learn what we can in mortality.  It is not smooth sailing, you won't have a perfect journey, things will be hard, and you'll do your best.  But part of learning is time.  It might take one person a single year of learning something and they are solid in it. It wasn't a tough choice, they knew right away what their answer was and they stuck with it.  Someone else might take 40 years to learn the same.  Questioning, doubting, wondering, ignoring, coming back to and finally knowing.  Guess what?  That's ok.

I hope that those who believe differently in regards to religion or any subject - treat each other with respect, love, kindness and consideration.  Happy Sunday.