This boy.  If ever a child's life was represented by a roller coaster, it's this kid.  And it's one of those rides that has triple loops, crazy climbs and death defying drops.  But man is he fun, full of excitement and you just want to get on that ride with him.  He turned 14 this summer, grew about 3 inches in a matter of months, and sometimes I have to double check that there is isn't an intruder in my house due to his lowered voice.  This summer has been one for the record books in so many ways, but I think the most important growth has happened in the last few weeks.

Jayce was able to attend Especially for Youth (EFY) at the BYU Provo campus for a week.  I was a little worried.  The first day he called and said he was ready to come home.  By by day 2, I had to fight for time to talk with him.  He was so busy learning to love 20 other people, and building his relationship with his Savior that I only got snippets of time to chat with him.  When I picked he and his friend Logan up after 6 days, both got solemnly into the car, each ones eyes brimming with tears. The emotion was tangible.  These boys knew that they had experienced something that wasn't going to be replicated in the real world.  They were leaving behind people they connected with on a level you rarely enjoy in your day to day lives.  It was a solid 20 minutes before either of them felt in control enough to speak much.  As the time passed they began to unravel the weeks events, remembering, reliving the adventure.  I learned about each of these youth who touched my sons life for the better. Each with a story and specific traits Jayce loved.  Jayce talked of the example of a boy his own age and how he wanted to learn to live with the joy and gratitude that he showed. Girls that showed respect, both for others and for themselves. A testimony meeting filled with the Spirit. Jayce said they sang with angels that day.  That he loved his Savior, so very much.  He told me how grateful he was to know that Jesus Christ knows our pain and our suffering so He can comfort us.

I never could have hoped for the growth I saw in my son that day.  Even days later he reminds me how grateful he is for the growth in his testimony.  He shares things he learned from the incredible teachers, counselors and friends at EFY, with our family during scripture study and family home evening.  I can't say enough about this program.  His confidence, testimony, knowledge, and his heart have grown, and I love it.  And I love this roller coaster boy.

Went up to my favorite spot this morning with my favorite running partner for an 8 mile run.  It's a 2000 ft elevation descent and the views are breathtaking.  Downhill running is the closest I imagine I can get to flying while still on the ground.  There are moments where I come around a corner and I am overwhelmed by the beauty and I love the fast pace of a downhill run.

About a mile in I realized I wasn't properly fueled.  It had been a busy morning and I forgot breakfast.  And it was getting warm pretty fast.  Instead of experiencing my favorite run, I had to use all my physical and mental reserves just to get down the hill.  My music wasn't cutting it for inspiration, and walking wasn't an option.  Then I thought about this week...

I was afforded the opportunity to go to youth conference up at Heber Valley with our stake youth group this week for a few days. It was Jayce's first youth conference.  I loved it.  Our theme was feasting on the words of Christ. It's the church's annual theme this year.  2 Nephi 31:20

"Wherefore, ye must press forward with a steadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of hope, and a love of God and all men. Wherefore if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the words of Christ, and endure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father, ye shall have eternal life."

We've recited it each Sunday in Young Women's.  I've heard it my whole life.  But those who taught us and allowed us to feast upon the words of Christ while there, changed my perspective.  It reminded me that scripture study and hearing the words of the prophets and apostles are necessary for our daily "runs".  There are often days when, like the run I had today I have to just get through the day.  But starting the day feasting on the scriptures and feeding my spirit will help me enjoy more moments and build upon the testimony I have.

About 4 miles in I was desperate, turned off my music and quickly found a conference talk to put in my ears as a distraction.  Though I didn't listen to the prophet the rest of the way down, it certainly gave me the boost I needed to keep going.  I am often reminded when I am running that my physical body is not the only part of me that is needed and used. My mind and spirit are just as important to nourish in order to experience a great run.

Janna background

I first met Janna when she interviewed me for the job at the OBGYN office.  I remember thinking she was just about the most bubbly and sunshiny person I'd ever met.  After I got the job, I remember thinking that both joy and misery were contagious.  She made that office joyful.  And we caught it.  It was about 9 months later that she had the mass in her stomach checked and found the cancer.  A baby friendship really.  But 9 months is all you need to grow a human, and it was certainly enough time to solidify a deep rooted friendship.  It's been about 7 months since she was diagnosed. A lot has happened.  Surgery, chemo, triumphs and sorrow.  She is still as joyful as the day I met her.  I have come to know and love her family.  Her children are here sometimes and I can see the influence of the their mother in the squeals and shrieks of happiness.  We moved to Cedar on a whim.  There was no concrete reason to move here.  No family, no friends, and no job.  Over the last nearly two years I have developed friendships that have changed me, opportunities that scare me, and a love for this town I now call my home.  Janna is a huge anchor for me here.  I know she is one of the reasons we were led here.  Not because she needed me,  she would be just as successful in her journey without me.  But because the Lord knew we needed each other.   She and I have often acknowledged the feeling that we are only carrying on a friendship developed long before this earth life.  I believe it too.

Shaved

It's been about 6 weeks since Janna found out that the chemo she's been using to battle her cancer wasn't working as they expected.  It seemed as though this was nearly as big a blow to her as the initial diagnosis.  This time, with the new chemo, she'd be losing her hair.  From the beginning I was on board with shaving my head in support of her.  And I'll admit, I was slightly relieved when I found out that the chemo they were using wasn't going to cause her to lose her hair.  Now, 6+ months later, a new chemo and she was facing yet another reality of cancers harsh impacts.  So, she got to work planning her head shaving party.  Yup, she put her joyful Janna spin on a crappy situation.  The invitation extended across social media and throughout her closest friends and family.  Dozens came to shave heads in support of her.  Men going bald, and women shaving the back of the hair.   It was quite a sight.  It was raining and cold, they put up canopies and smiles were in abundance.  Jan and I went first.  James shaved hers, while Jason shaved mine.  I wondered how my emotions would fare, but we just giggled and laughed through the process.

The week following, Janna struggled.  I imagine the realities of cancer hit hard each time she looked in the mirror.  I know it affected me deeply.  I was a wreck leading up to that day, and the following week.  It didn't take long for her to pull herself up and out of the shadows of sadness and thank her Heavenly Father for the time she has been given.  She said, "I realized, if I had to give up my hair to spend more time with my family, I would gladly do it".

It's been a unique experience for me.  I'm not ill, I'm not fighting for my life.  But I have no hair.  I'm a pretty confident person, but walking into church, school, stores without hair for the first week or so was intimidating. It was akin to walking into those places naked.  The response of strangers was neat.  Some glanced so quickly as to not stare, some responded with warm and sympathetic looks, I even had one kid point and loudly say, " haha! Mom! That lady is bald! hahahaha! She has no hair!"

The very next day after we shaved our heads was Sunday.  Church.  I was fine all the way into the building. Until I had to walk through the chapel.  I stopped.  Physically frozen realizing the people in there would respond.  Until very clearly the thought came to me, I am uncomfortable.  That's the maximum.  This wasn't hard.  This wasn't up there with any of the hard things I have done in my life. I was merely uncomfortable.  And the thought that followed was, this place is safe.  These people love me.  Support me.  And they did.  And they do.  I am grateful. And I kind of love not having hair.

Balboa Island

The stars aligned for a second year in a row and a trip to Balboa Island with 10 of my nearest and dearest was accomplished.  There are a lot of things that have come together in a perfect storm for a trip like this to happen.  Eleven moms and fourty-four children.   Schedules, emotions, husbands, and babysitters were juggled.  It was worth it.  The weather was ideal, the beach was beautiful, the food delicious and the location perfect.  Our weekend was filled with shopping, beach bumming, food indulgence, jogging along the water, laughter, and late nights.  I loved it all.  More than all of that, I loved the change I felt in the relationships I have with these women.  Conversations about deep emotions, fears, joys, trials, and triumphs.  We grew together in our moments of laughter so intense we nearly fell over, we grew in our moments of near insanity while staying up way too late, we even grew in our moments of hurt and forgiveness when apologies were needed.  I see these women differently than I did before we embarked this weekend.  I love them.  I appreciate them. I am grateful for them.

I have been blessed in my life.  I've said it before and I will repeat it.  I have a Father in Heaven who has given me the gift of friendship everywhere I go.  I love those friends from my past and present.  I am grateful for you.  There was a concern discussed on several occasions this weekend.  It was a discussion stemmed from love of those who feel left out.  It's a common thread that weaves through communities with so many wonderful families.  We discussed our first impressions we felt about each other and how time has a way of sorting out our misunderstandings and the fears we have about personality differences.  We talked of things we have said to each other that may have been hurtful and that forgiveness never has an expiration.  Not one of of the ladies, including myself, I spent the last 4 days with, is perfect.  Each of us has strengths and weaknesses, things to work on and things to teach.  These women teach me that imperfections are not a reason to avoid friendship.  So reach out and be willing to accept some imperfection.  I promise the joys far out weigh the flaws.

Stupid Gap.

Each time I thought about how I wanted my kids to have this awesome history to read, I thought "I should write this or that down soon." Soon turned into a year and a half.  Now there's a stupid gap.  A gap that so many wonderful memories could have filled.  Tonight as I sat at a baby and bridal mash up shower, and was asked to write down some advice for the bride and advice for the mama to be, I found myself sharing with her that writing down a history of your childs life well past their 5th birthday is IMPORTANT.

Today, 11 year old Lainy went to the movies alone with some of her friends who are already in Jr High.  I was in such a flurry putting the finishing touches on a dessert for the shower that I couldn't even mourn the moment.  It was a passing panic moment that I watched fly out the door with her.  She's growing at a pace my heart isn't ready for.

Jared spent the afternoon at Gabe's house.  A boy who has some social issues.  A boy who when I called his parents to send Jared home, said how grateful they were that Jared has been coming to play because Gabe has never had a friend come over and play.  I asked Jared how it has been going and he said, he liked going over there.  He knows Gabe doesn't have friends and wants to be his friend.  When did he learn that?  When did his soft heart expand to a circle larger than our family?  Pin pointing when those those qualities we spend our whole lives teaching take hold is a blurry moment.

Jayce spent the day with a newish friend.  I have prayed for months that he be led to a good friend.  A great friend. Someone who will make the good choices I know in his heart he wants to make along side him.  Someone who needs a good friend as much as he does.  As much as his mom does.

Today I write to deny a gap.  To remind myself of my blessings.  Of which I have many.

Lainybug turns 10

My Lainy and her crazy emotions.  At 10, she's trying to wrangle the ups and downs that wrestle inside her little body.  She hasn't asked to put holes in her ears yet, but leg shaving is a requirement as of today.  My little bare legged beauty is growing up.  Her body was built to be an athlete (for which I was thrilled!) and maybe that is in her future, but her heart belongs to the furry four legged creatures of the earth.  It's all she talks, draws, writes, plays, and dreams about.  Even when I drove by her school and caught a glimpse of her and a handful of friends, she and the others were crawling around on hands and knees in the grass, as cheetahs if I had to guess.

I haven't always been thrilled with her natural and all consuming love of animals.  I was heart broken when her soccer coach and I agreed that she didn't love soccer as much as I wanted her to.  But if you ever have the chance to see her in action with animals, it's as if she was born to love them.  She struggles to get through a page of math homework.  But will spend hours researching and writing about a single creature, just for fun!

Lainy loves her brothers in spite of their boyish irritations.   I have no doubt that she has softened, shared bravery, joy, and imagination to her brothers, and they have been forever blessed by her being sandwiched between them as siblings.  

Some days she rocks my world and I am ready to string her up by her boot straps.  But I too am forever blessed by this little blonde haired child I am so grateful to call my daughter.

Love you so much my little Lainy!!

Be Still

Silence has never been my favorite thing.  I usually associate silence with impending doom, awkwardness, being unproductive, or just plain boredom.  Because of this I like mindless chatter and background or blaring music.   Today I read this. 

I almost didn't read it.  I wasn't in a churchy mood.  (Probably because my brain is on overload with all the music blaring)  But as soon as I read the first of 10 ways to recognize God's power in times of trouble, I was all in.  She begins by breaking down all of the words that are associated with the word still.  (Psalms 46:10) "Be still and know that I am God."

Still: free from noise or turbulence; untroubled

When we are free from outside noise or turbulence, we are able to hear the still small voice of God's Spirit as he comes to comfort and guide us through our trials. Some of the noise we experience that could be blocking our ability to feel God’s presence is our own worry. When we learn to change our thoughts from negative to positive, we are more able to feel God’s love because we are in harmony with him. The noise and turbulence is replaced by a sweet melody of peace.

I had a minute of crazy last week.  We are just finishing up the process of building our home and there was a hiccup along the way.  Everything has gone so smoothly throughout this whole process that when we hit that speed bump, my panic went sailing and landed in a huge pile of worry.  My initial reaction was loud, sometimes coming out in words of blame and anger.  I knew I was acting irrational.  You know when your vacuuming and your going along, la dee dah, and you think you hear something?  So you shut off the vacuum and listen.  Nothing.  Rev it up again, only to think you heard something again, and once you shut it off again you realize your phone was ringing?  Yeah, I had that.  Only it wasn't the vacuum, it was my worry.  And it wasn't the phone, it was the Spirit.  I felt as if I kept feeling like someone was there trying to tell me to have faith.  And I heard it.  Sort of.  I knelt on my knees and tried to pray.  It turned into more of a crazy persons rocking in the corner, but I was making an effort. 

So, when I read this article today, I realized I was creating so much noise, blocking my ability to feel God's presence, or to hear the Spirit whisper what I was trying so desperately to hear. 

I have this habit.  I used to call it my nature.  But I realize it's only a habit, and I have the ability to change it.  This habit is that I am loud.  I am reactive, quick to anger, and I use sarcasm.  These habits have trickled down to my children.  I often throw my hands into the air in exasperation when confronted with a loud, reactive, sarcastic child.  I have a dear friend who pointed out to me that it was time I made some changes. Oh yeah, also I am SUPER inconsistent.  She has been teaching me how to make small changes that have made gigantic results.  Then she sent me this.  What?  I haven't even scratched the surface of this lady's calm parenting tactics.  But just listening to the 9 minute intro helped me realize that it is NOT my nature.  It is merely a habit, and lack of intellect and practice. 

So silence.  I still don't love it.  An empty house with no noise stresses me out.  but there is a difference between silence and stillness.  There have to be moments and chapters of stillness in order for us to be able to hear the small voice trying to inspire and direct us. 

It was a week of field trips.  I attended with Lainy's class to the AZ Science center.  There were double the number chaperones needed, so Lainy and I ended up having a little day date!  We had a grand time.  We had season passes there last year, so we were right at home.

A few days later I went with Jayce's 6th grade class to the Renaissance Festival.  First, it is my very least favorite time period.  I can't stand their rude mannerisms (which all the workers adhered to very well) the wardrobes, the women's roles, the fact that the men would ride horses next to each other while all geared up in metal suits and try and ram one another with a giant pole.  I mean, really.  Jousting doesn't seem manly, it seems cowardly.  If I didn't already have a bad taste in my mouth, this field trip would have psychologically created a distain for the place. 

I arrived at the school and was handed the list of names that would be in my group.  9 boys.  The moms who had groups of 8 girls just looked at me empathetically.  Ok, 9 boys.  I can do this.  I scan the list.  Sebastian.  He is a doll.  And a handful.  His teacher approached at that moment to let me know that Sebastian came to school super pumped, and said that he didn't take his ADHD meds this morning because he wanted to have "the BEST day EVER!"  Super.  Thanks parents. 

The bus ride was uneventful, and as I am gathering my baseball team, another teacher calls me over.  This time with an epi-pen in hand, she asks me to keep it close by and does a run through on how to administer it.  I ask Jack what he's allergic to.  He say he doesn't really know.  Um, What?  He says they think it's environmental, but haven't pinpointed what sets him off.  Super.  Let's head off into a dustbowl full of crap in the air and hope you don't die. 

Ok, off we go and thus began the day of 123456789...123456789...123456789... I counted this all day long.  It was student day at the festival, so we were walking with a crowd the whole day.  It wasn't long before I realized I had a wanderer.  Christian.  And he wasn't listening when I called to him.  Which is when Jayce fed me the little morsel of info that he was partially deaf.  Christian was supposed to be wearing hearing aids, but probably wanted to have the best day ever too, and didn't wear them.  This was most definitely NOT my best day ever. 

I don't know what these boys went home and told their parents, and frankly, I don't care.  I count the day as a success because I didn't yell at or lose anyone. 

Quick story to remember for Jayce:

Jayce is my guy who is famous for kitchen pickpocketing.  He will have snaked a piece of gum from the inside zipper of my purse hanging on a hook without having missed a step.  Candy in the top cupboard behind other gross food he would never touch?  Swiped.  Chocolate chips are stored in my freezer.  They disappear by the handful.  Natural consequences are always better than inflicted ones. 

He and his dad were having a nice game of chocolate chip tossing one day.  You know, when you toss one in the air and try to catch in your mouth?  They had been at it for a while, and there were a handful of chocolate chips on the floor, so they scooped them up and recycled them into the game. (gross)  What Jayce didn't know, and Jason didn't remember, was that Flapjacks dog food had been spilled in that very spot in the kitchen earlier.  As the game came to a close, Jayce took his remaining handful of chocolate chips and popped them all into his mouth.  As he chomped away he knew there was something funky about it.  Jason started to tell him it was dog food, but after Jayce started to gag, he changed it to "probably just bad chocolate, just swallow it".

Quitters never prosper. And neither do their children.

We call today Crazy Thursday.  It's the day of the week that the kids have a nutso schedule.  I am usually a bit more tightly wound on these days due to the crazy.  We added a basketball game to the mix today for Jayce, and I was looking forward to watching him play. 

I played basketball through high school and have a bit of a hot streak by nature. Especially when it comes to sports.   Jayce doesn't see a whole lot of playing time.  He has played one season besides this one.  After last weeks game, I told Jason that if Jayce wasn't mad about not seeing much playing time that it was time to pull him.  After today's game, I was pretty bugged. From the stands I actually said to him while he was on the bench, "tell the coach you want in, or I will"  Yeah, I'm that mom.  So, after his whopping 3 minutes in the game we had this conversation. 

Me: Hey, you did awesome today.  How are you feeling about basketball? 
J: Good
M: So do you feel like maybe we ought to play the next session or give it a rest?
J: I want to play
M: You barely got any game time.  Do you even like playing?
J: I love basketball.  These kids have been playing for 5 or more years.  They are really good.  I just started.  I just need some more time. 

Oh. Duh. 

Flashback to my younger years.  I totally sucked at the game.  But I LOVED it.  I played as often as I could keep a ball in my hands.  And after 6 years, I remember when coach called my name to start. (First string)  I was not a starter; until that day. 

How did I develop this ridiculous thought that unless he was really good, that he should quit?  After swallowing my very large bite of humble pie, we talked about how we would work together to help him work hard and learn. 

Signed,  Parent in training.

It has been a week!   First, the (huge) young man who bullied Jayce last year apparently had not gotten it all out of his system and after many, many ding dong ditch attempts to irritate, he decided it would be a sly idea to dump a large amount of green goo onto my porch.  Solid idea dude.  Way to show me.  Would have been a good idea to not get caught by 2 neighbors and your own grandfather.  Hopefully, that will be the end of that.

Second (or maybe this was first...  It's a little blendy), after 3 days of thinking I smelled gas, I finally called the gas company.  Here's how it went down.  Brandon (the gas guy) shows up all ghost buster-like, wand in hand and after making a sweep of my house with it, informed me that we were not in danger of an explosion according to his wand readings.  Whew! Thanks for that.  After further assessment, his under control attitude developed a underlying level of panic.  His pace picked up as did his perspiration.  He told me later that he was trying to assess whether or not we should evacuate.  Seriously??  He had found a large gas leak in the attic next to the furnace.  Yeesh.  Smart man to recognize that the gas meter was running without the furnace or water heater being on.  Apparently, if you have to ask the homeowner (renter) to vacate, they have to call the fire dept.  After I saw him zipping to and fro, I took Flapjack outside with me. 

And Lastly, a little kung Fu gone awry.  I so badly wish I had the sense to have been filming when this happened...   Jared is the youngest, and by now I know that you cannot hinder a child's imagination by giggling at them.  So, when Jared asked me to come into the hallway to watch him, I had my game face on.   He started some karate moves, slicing, kicking, sweeping kicks,  it was all very fast and very intense.  He got going so fast that I was beginning to lose my straight face and encouraging tone, and just at that moment his front kick became his last, when it connected with his face.  It was really, really funny.   I'm laughing even now as I remember it.  Oh was he ever mad.  I could not get control of myself and the laughter.  I tried to pick him up and hug him to hide my laughing, no dice.  He was mad as a hornet.  He had quite a fat lip from it.  Love you little man.  Sorry, I know I shouldn't have laughed.  Hopefully, you'll laugh at it too someday.

 

Is this love, that I'm feelin'

Jared has a sweet friend nearby, and they play together often.   He and Hannah have been good buddies for quite some time, they are pretty well suited for one another in their equality for chaos, excitement, and joy.   Jared has recently bumped up a notch in his feelings for this little one.  Hannah, concerned, came to me to let me know that Jared had said those three little words to her.  I told her that yes, he does love her.  That they are such good friends.  "um, no he meant more than friends" came her response. 

In a chat with him later, I asked him about it, and indeed he was not talking friendship.  After a reminder about dating and the different kinds of love, I let him know that the kind of I love you he wanted to share was best kept until he is older.  To which he responded, "But mom!  I had to tell her, I was running out of time, we're moving! I had to tell her before it was too late!" 

Touché little buddy, touché.

Cuz I'm movin' out

The last 5 years have been pretty blurry as far as stability.  Not according to plan, well not according to my plan...  But an incredible journey tipping the scales with more happiness, friendships and growth than anything else.  See, I can say that in hindsight because I'm already through a whole lot of the crap that hit the fan.  I see the blessings that came out of it all. 

We landed here in this house nearly 2 years ago.  I LOVE IT HERE.  (In case heaven wants to change its mind, and I haven't been clear)  But alas, we are moving forward again.  This time, out of state.  Cedar City UT to be exact.  Yes.  Me.  Living in Utah.  It's beautiful and I love it there.  Most of the time I am filled with excitement and gratitude for the opportunity.   All of the other moments are filled with nausea, at the thought of leaving my sisters and so many dear friends. 

I am thankful my children were given the opportunity to learn how to accept change these past few years, they are such troopers.  We have spent some time up there already traipsing through the hills, hiking and exploring.  The kids were in heaven, snow and hiking?  They couldn't imagine why mom was grumbling.

So, Cheers to our last warm AZ winter.  I will miss you. 

Snakes and Potatoes

In case you wondered, pouring expired dehydrated potatoes down the drain is NOT a good idea.  As I was running the water to wash them down and popped on the disposal, I thought no big deal.  Until I noticed the other side of my sink was filling up.  It was that moment I realized my snafu...  2 hours, a trip to home depot, constant snaking, a bottle of Drano, and lots of "no talking" and "No questions, I need silence"  the water finally runs through.  Also,  I think I hate potatoes.  My kids cheered, but mostly because I told them they couldn't have a muffin until I had fixed the sink.  

 

This is not the only time in my life that potatoes have gotten the better of me.  It is no secret that I have a larger list than most, of foods I do not care for.   As a child, potatoes were on that list.  I was creative in my younger years at making food disappear.  It went well beyond the spread-your-food to-make-it look-like-you-ate-more, and the old stuff-it-in-your-napkin trick.  No, this time I thought outside the box.  Grams was visiting that week and while cleaning up the table, noticed something peculiar on the floor beneath the chair I had been sitting in.    Snakes!    Upon further inspection, came laughter (thank goodness).  I had taken my mashed potatoes, lifted the seat cushion and stuffed them under it.  I can only assume I had planned to come back later and get rid of it properly.  I hadn't factored in that the chairs were wicker under that seat cushion... 

 

Just another day in paradise

bloody nose

covered in pond water

bruised and scraped but not broken

Sounds like a typical Sunday right?  Here's the story...

Church was only an hour this morning due to some ward boundary changes, and with Jason out of town we thought we would venture out. Jayce had a bloody nose before we even left, Jared's foot connected with his face in a game of craziness on the couch.  It was decided that we would take a bike ride to a park about 2 miles away.  Perfect day.  Perfect weather, perfect attitudes (almost) and no time constraints.  We fed ducks, fish, and even turtles.  It was while feeding the turtles that things started to take a turn...  Jared started to lose focus and right next to me, in he went.  There was a moment of panic in his eyes, and I yanked him back up on solid ground.  I started to laugh.  And then I couldn't control it.  I was trying so hard to be as concerned and stone faced as he clearly wanted me to be.  Sweet boy.  We stayed another hour at least and not a complaint.  He was soggy clear up to his chest.  Before heading home we rode to the back of the park.  I say park,  but this is not your typical park.  It's nearly 50 acres.  Some of the hills were calling to us to be ridden.   Doesn't quite qualify as a Sabbath activity.  And that's when unfortunate event #3 happened.   They all had a go at the hills, and after seeing how much speed was involved, I capped it at one time each.  Lainy's need for speed overtook her need to be obedient.  So, down she went, and then down she went. We checked her out and after making fairly certain nothing was broken, she picked herself up by her bootstraps and we rode the 2 miles home.  Now I need a nap. 

Everyday Lovlies

• L and JR who would rather read together during reading time in the evenings
• L singing poetry to JR, who loves hearing her as much as she loves to sing
• JY and L who both live so passionately and loudly that when they fight it's like an explosion, and when they laugh and play together its like fireworks.
• A home with screens to enjoy the weather
• Friendships.
• Flowers made from paper
• you teach, and teach, and teach,  and then finally they choose to learn.  And it's beautiful.
• Lessons that you know were meant as answers to prayer
• Spontaneous laughter- JR's in particular, it still sometimes comes out with complete wildness and no inhibitions.  I love it.  
• Halloween candy
• silence.

Let's pretend it hasn't been 2 and a half months since my last entry and jump right in.

JR never did have a birthday post from last month and my thoughts are on him tonight.  This guy is currently a bit toothless.  Two front teeth, gone.  And one or two missing from the bottom too.  I thought somehow his little face wouldn't be as cute without those teeny tiny teeth up front.  Boy was I mistaken!  He turned 7 last month. Yeesh.  JR has had a few funky habits the last year or so...

My sisters and I were out for a jog the other night, and one casually asked if JR had given up his "mouth stretching" habit.  He would always open his mouth really wide and stretch out his mouth.  It was weird.  Coupled with that, he was a lip licker.  Uh huh.  Red clown lips ALL THE TIME.   It bugged me to no end.  I tried the soft-kind-reminder approach, the you-get-to-choose-for-yourself approach, and the your-friends-are-going-to-make-fun-of-you approach.  Nothing worked.  Finally the angry-you-will-be-in-so-much-trouble-if-you-lick-your-darn-lips-again approach did the trick!  Then, with a giggle Shelley reminded me of his last years habit...

JR was learning to read last year and whenever he saw a word on a sign or paper he would "trace" it with his eyes and move his head in the direction of the "tracing".  He got so proficient with that, and the habit began.  He would "head trace" everything.  Then I realized he had gone from tracing to just wobbling his head all the time.  It was pretty funny.  And weird.  I tried all of the above tactics.  I cant remember why it stopped.  But it did.   My sisters and I had a good laugh when we coupled all of those funny JR habits together.

To my tiny,

I love you with every inch of my heart.  You make me laugh and know just the right moments that I need a snuggle or a kiss.  You are such a great friend and know how to keep us on our toes.  I love you tiny person.  Love, Mom

Are you crazy???

I'm SURE that is what many of you want to say when I tell you I have chosen to homeschool my 6th grader.  So far, I don't feel that way.  It came as much of a surprise to me when I entertained the thought late last school year.  But that stubborn little thought would not leave my mind.  So, I rolled it around a bit.  And the more I rolled it, the more snowball- like it became.  It was one of those things that after prayer, fasting, meditation, and temple attendance confirmed over and over (just to be sure I wasn't crazy) I knew I wanted/had to do.  Many steps over the course of the last few years have led me here, I just didn't realize they were headed up the homeschool mountain. 

It is a beautiful thing to research, study, and dig into the kind of curriculum you know your child will love.  And believe me, I have done my share of digging and researching.  It is astounding the kinds of resources there are to choose from!  Also, I must note: to the people who have been willing to take me under their wing and share their incredible knowledge and journey of homeschooling, thank you.  I would be lost without you. 

Today was Day 1.  And it was already so awesome.  This boy who does not have a love for learning spent 6 hours with me learning and we both loved it!  I know there will be windy days ahead, and I have no idea how long we will continue it, but if the Lord says it's a good thing, then we are sailing on! 

Winding down... and up again...

Phew!  This summer has been the fastest and fullest we have experienced yet!  I sure wish I had written it all down.  We spent a chunk of time off and on in CA visiting with my parents, going to Scottie and Jen Williams wedding, and just spending time with Jason when he wasn't working. 

Our final summer adventure was a camping-ish trip up north to Prescott.  Took a few tries to get there due to changes in work schedule, but we got there and set up in a beautiful camp location, pitched our tent and...

• spent hours trying to locate firewood (found some after dark!)
• hiked the next day to the lake, canoed and paddle boated out hearts out
• came back to find the van battery dead (thank you fellow camper for rescuing us)
• and a giant hole in the tent from Flapjack trying to get IN it
• while in town, the skies finally opened up and let us have it
• taught the kids how not to react well to the unexpected soaking of bedding, chairs, tent etc.
• spent the next 2 days vacationing my favorite way... in a wonderful (and dry!) hotel
• Hit the Sharlot Hall museum (AMAZING history museum of the area)
• Walked old town Prescott shops, love the artsy shops
• Settled in with the old folks for music in the park, & our very own solo dancer (near strip tease) center stage. 
• Drove around aimlessly looking at houses to replace our current inferno, but didn't fall in love with the place. 

And today we started school!  Which is another post...