The 10 virgins taught me today

I drove home tonight filled with emotion.  I had received so much information at once, and I didn’t want to lose any of it before I could get home and get it out on paper.  I found myself literally holding my breath and crunching my stomach down as if I could somehow hold it in from disappearance. 

I should begin earlier in the day….   My sister and I had moment of frustration with one another on a miscommunication of where I should be tonight.  To an important dinner with her, or at my women’s Relief Society event.  I had disappointed her when I told her I wanted to go to my meeting.  I wrestled with myself throughout the day on whether I had made the right decision. 

This event was a play of sorts put on by women portraying Christ’s biblical parable of the 10 virgins.  Through song they retold the story of these women and what might have been their life’s blessings or challenges and how it played into meeting the Bridegroom.  As each women told her story, I saw myself and those I love in each one.  I saw my mother in the woman who spent all of her time serving and comforting others and lit the way for those who suffered,  I cried when I saw myself in another who was endlessly busy with day to day life, that had often run out of time to fill her lamp, or even light it daily.  I saw dear friends in the face of one whose life was filled with grief and sorrow, whose lamp was broken and could only be made whole again by one…  I saw the world in a young woman who was plagued by self doubt, and envious of those around her.  I yearned for the simplicity of another and the peace in her eyes as she described her love for her Savior.  Each had a story.  Each had a message.  Each story told, brought to my mind vivid answers to questions I had been searching for.  There are few times in my life that I have known without a doubt that the spirit was actually speaking words to my mind.  Tonight, I had no doubt. 

I am thankful to my Savior for the message given tonight.  For the comfort spoken to my soul.  I understand why it was a bit of a battle to make the decision to attend.  I understand my Heavenly Father as well as the adversary knew what I would gain tonight. 

Baa baa black sheep

Jess and Shannon have always had a jovial competition as siblings as to who was the rightful owner of the title ‘Black sheep’ in our family.  I, on the other hand am happy to sidestep that title.

I have been hearing a bit about sheep in the past few months.  Well, more about those who tend the sheep.  So there are shepherds, and then there are sheep herders.  There’s a difference.  Did you know that?  A Shepherd leads His sheep, guiding them.  While a sheep herder pushes the sheep from behind, forcing them in the direction he wants them to go. 

Is it any wonder why Christ is often referred to as our Shepherd?  I tend to be a sheep herder generally.  My sister Megan this written in her home:

REACT

  I believe it is the way Christ teaches us.  He doesn’t react to our mistakes, hopes, or pleadings.  He acts, and allows us to follow His perfect example.  I need to be better at teaching my children well enough, that when they happen upon a speed bump, they will know how to handle it, instead of watching them go full force toward the speed bump and screaming and chasing after them trying to make them avoid catastrophe.  Sigh.  So much to work on! 

I’m taking a sick day

Cough.cough.cough. Cough.cough.cough. Cough.cough.cough. Cough.cough.cough. Cough.cough.cough. Cough.cough.cough. Cough.cough.cough. Cough.cough.cough. Cough.cough.cough.

It’s like a bronchial symphony.  Fevers breaking, tempers following suit.  Add cabin fever with the rain and mud and you have my week/weekend/looking like this week too.  It’s been really great.  I have even gotten to clean up vomit a dozen or so times.  The one time we ventured outdoors…. 

Jayce felt well enough to head outback and kick his soccer ball around.  Right over the back fence which backs up to a main road.  So, I throw off my robe, head out and start the walk around the corner in my pajamas.  The kids look haggard but seem to enjoy this breath of fresh air.  Until they start coughing. And I swear once one starts, the others have this subconscious need to chime in.  Jayce gets a hold of the soccer ball and we head back home. We have just one more house between us and home…  and Lainy is coughing uncontrollably.   I’m hurrying them along so as not to sicken the neighbors… and she turns and throws up right in my neighbors driveway.  Yay.  I practically sneered at lainy to ‘get in the house now.’  (poor thing.  She was so sick.)  And ran back outside with a pitcher of water…  

Feeling like a kid again

Jared:  Mom, when I grow up and you and dad are my kids, I will give you a whole piece of gum. 

Mom:  Wow, Jared.  That is super nice of you.  How many kids will you have? 

He turned, sort of studied me for a minute, looked pointedly from me to Jason and back. “Two.  You and Dad.” 

Boy, am I glad that’s not the way it works.  Pay back can be a scary thing…

Practically Perfect in every way

I love Mary Poppins.  I can’t count how many times I have been enlightened by her.  She’s confident and self assured, but not to a flaw.  She breaks out into song in a public place and no one seems to think she is a loon.  She can fly. Doesn’t mind getting dirty.  She knows when her time is spent, and makes a perfect exit.  Of all the times I had watched, I never caught this little phrase until passing by it while my kids were mesmerized by this wonderful character.

“Enough is as good as a feast”

I know.  Read it again.  I heard it and it literally stopped me where I stood.  How had I missed this perfect little gem all my life?  I find myself complaining more often than I like admitting about the things I own, or the house I live in, but I have now added this little phrase and it slips me back into my reality in which I should be down on my knees expressing my gratitude for the blessings I do have. 

Our house… is a very very very fine house.

This new house was foreign to me.  It was an intruder in my life.  (A blessing, but an intruder nonetheless)   Nothing was the right shape or size or color.  I was kind of angry with it. 

I had a good departure from the old house.  I spent some time walking through it watching memories replay themselves as I allowed some tears to slip out. 

New house is now full of all of our unnecessary things.   And just like that, after 2 weeks… it feels like home.  I have found a lot of things to love and a few things to annoy. 

And although my ‘stuff’ helps make these walls feel familiar and more comfortable, it’s my family that make this our home. 

Sink or Swim

I hadn’t blogged in a while.  I started a few days ago, but all I could squeeze out was a few scratch-the-surface memories and thoughts. 

I knew this post was coming. Lurking in the back of my scattered little mind.  The moving post.   I have been inching across the diving board toward the water for months now.  It’s time to dive in.  Make our move.  In 2 weeks.  My house is half packed.  It’s sold.  Sigh.  I talked pretty big.  No tears allowed.  I only talked about the good and excitement in all of it.  Bright, shiny, and new.   Now, looking over the edge, I would like to baaaaack up, right down into my nice comfy familiar pool chair.  Have you been there?  But you can’t backup.  There’s a line.  You have to jump.  So I am standing here crying on the edge of the diving board hoping it will just go away. 

I don’t want to be the kid who cries at the edge of the diving board that someone puts out of their misery by giving me a swift shove over the edge. 

I know I’m not dying, or even moving very far.  But I’ll miss my friends.  My home. My familiarity.  

And in I go! (envision me gracefully twirling through the air, a couple of flips and just the tiniest splash.) 

Lainy turns 6, and I get older.

 Lainy and I share a birthday week, and sometimes Turkey Day is thrown in there.  Her dear and talented Aunt Shelley made her this beautiful tutu and wand combo.  (LOVE) 

 

I got a little carried away and went a little Vegas showgirl that night…  I know, hard to believe there was no drinking involved…

You can’t tell, but behind the paper were two glorious treasures.  My mom had taken all of my childhood photos and put them in order in two beautiful photo albums.  And those cute earrings I have on are from her.  (Thanks mom!)

And this picture is for Shannon.  I idolized my sister Shannon growing up (I still do) and every time something exciting happened to me, her name was the one that came out of my mouth, since she was usually the one I wanted to share the news with. I have countless pictures of me with this less than glamorous facial distortion.  I’m sure I was saying her name yet again here… 

 

We had our annual gingerbread decor contest that weekend as well.  Boys vs kids vs girls.  We won.  Hands down. (Though I’m not sure the boys know that)

Thanksgiving was wonderful and fattening.  Great week.  Christmas post is coming along nicely…. 

Hi Ho Hi Ho back on Steroids we go…

I have two asthmatics, and one very healthy child.  Jayce has had it since he was a tiny person and now that he is older we have a handle in his medication.  But Jared…   oh my goodness.  He shows no normal symptoms of an asthmatic.  He seems to be able to breath deeply, but cannot stop the chronic coughing.  Remember last year?  He coughed for months.  I’m not talking a little cough here and there.  ALL NIGHT. EVERY NIGHT.  We tried all kinds of meds, had his tonsils and adenoids removed, slept keeping him sitting upright with a bowl next to him for when he coughed so hard he threw up.  (I know, I know, woe is me.  I’m documenting history here…) 

Once the summer hit (and all things living died, hence no allergies)  The boys slept like babies again minus being stuffed with steroids, creams, and antihistamines.  Winter hit and here we are again.  Doc said to keep up his steroid regimen, but to also put him on OTC Claritin.  Really?  Claritin?  C’mon.  We took the kids tonsils out for crying in the night, you think it’s as simple as Claritin?

MM HMM.  It is. 

Slept like a rock.  For a month.  Until I decided to mess with it again.  Why do I do that?  Oh, it’s working, surely we should mess with it and see if we can screw it up fix it some more.  Two nights of coughing cured me.  Back on all those blessed meds. 

Ok, here’s the thing.  (The point of this novel)  I complain a LOT about everything I have to give my boys for this thing called asthma.  But really, I need to add it to my daily prayers.  Because I wouldn’t have either of my boys anymore, if it weren’t for all of these things that may or may not have horrible side effects.  So….  I LOVE Flovent, I LOVE Pulmicort, I LOVE Hydrocortisone cream, I LOVE Albuterol, I LOVE Immunotherapy drops.  Because I LOVE my boys. 

Good teeth come to those who wait…

I thought this kid was going to be 10 before he got his teeth back.  I would venture to guess he is the only 3rd grader in his school still missing his front teeth.  I even took him to dentist to make sure there were some IN there waiting to pop through.  Today, 8 full months after it came out, it has made it’s debut. 

Jared:  sniff sniff.    SNIFF SNIFF.

Mom: You ok?

Jared: Yeah, I have a booger in my nose. 

Mom: Let me see, do you need a tissue? 

Jared: (Proceeds to blow nose.)

Mom: Did it work?

Jared: It needs a finger up there.

He lives in a pineapple under the sea

I never thought I would say I miss SpongeBob.

I always put cable TV on hold for the 6 months while the weather is beautiful in AZ.  So, we right now have the basic shows.  As Jared was watching one of these channels (qubo) I was doing dishes and catching a bit of it.  I kept hearing the term ‘belly button lint’.  My interest was piqued. 

There are a handful of animals that are friends and were each collecting their own lint.  Some of the more villainous characters were stealing the lint from others.  (gag)  Turns out there is an annual belly button lint weighing contest. 

In case you are still held in suspense, (I know I was feeling something other than suspense) The villian is found out and is disqualified. 

So, need I repeat…

I MISS SPONGEBOB.

Miss you nanner.

If this picture is the only good thing that came out of Thanksgiving weekend, all the prep and crazy would be worth it!  But it’s not…  More to come!

A little privacy please?

I almost never write about Jason.  He’s such a private person.  Maybe I don’t out of respect for his privacy…

NAH. 

Several years ago I asked a marriage counselor a simple question. It wasn’t phrased so much as a question as it was a slur of words spit out in exasperation. 

“Why can’t we just have a normal marriage, like everyone else??”

He laughed.  That counselor laughed.  A good hearty laugh.  He of all people would know.  No normal marriage is what it seems. 

We both have taken our turn, well…  turning things upside down.  We started messing things up when we first got married,  and continued on doing so now for nearly 10 years.  We just figured out there will always be things to mess up, things with which to make mistakes, things that need fixing. Thaaaat’s the part we’re getting good at.  The fixing.  We know how to make a mountain out of a mole hill, and how to avoid doing it.   We have traveled (tripped/stumbled) down the road of sorrow.  And then headed back on the path to forgiveness.  We still have a long journey ahead.  BUT…

We have never laughed so loudly, smiled so broadly, loved so deeply, as we do now in our 10th year together.  He is my friend. My companion.  My love. 

It’s in the fine print

So I bought some new clippers. 

Aren’t they pretty?  They sound like a jet engine when you turn them on.  And they are awesome.  I could shear a sheep with these babies.   So today I was looking through the warranty info and reading the fine print. 

This warranty does not cover normal wear of parts or damage, resulting from any of the following…  (it goes on to list)  …Further, the warranty does not cover: Acts of God, such as fire, flood, hurricanes, and tornadoes. 

It doesn’t cover Acts of God!  I shouldn’t be surprised that God was mentioned here, but I was.  It could’ve said, the warranty doesn’t cover natural disasters, a phenomenon, a supernatural event, freak accident, or aliens taking over planet earth.    Thank you Oster for this small print truth. 

 

Pick a chick

Fall Carnival was last weekend and I have three additions to the family.  Chick number one, Beautiful unicorn sparkle bird, and Motorcycley.  Keep in mind we live a bit out of city limits so the festivities fell into the categories of Money Goat (they tied money to a goat and the kids chased it), the Chick chase, and the typical, bounce house, dunk tank, cake walk, etc etc, and the concession stands.   Lainy was all in for the chick chase.  I had to coerce Jared into lining up.  He was not enthusiastic.  I figured I didn’t have much to worry about.  Until they both came giggling and squealing each carrying a wiggling and squeaking chick.  What are the chances?   There were like 30 kids in their group and 6 chicks!  Ok, I figured we could give them away later right?  Then Jayce’s group was up.  The older they got, the more competitive it got.  The chase ended and Jayce was empty handed.  Phew.  But wait!  A chick had escaped.  Through the fence and into the adjacent field.  The kids stood watching it run free it seemed.  Until a kid shimmied up and over said fence and grabbed the fleeing chicka-doo.  My kid.  3 for 3!?  I heard myself sigh loudly as a mother consoled her child walking by empty handed and in tears. 

There was no prying those chickens away after that.   Jayce refused to name his.  (He assumed for a while that we would eventually eat it.)  It’s been a full week.  They still wake every morning with the words can I go see my chick? on their tiny tired lips.  And every afternoon they spend hours playing with them.  I’m getting used to the idea. 

My Autumn Eyes by Jayce

My autumn eyes behold

The tall tree at home.

The big fat person.

The tiny milk dud.

The little tiny weirdo.

 

*** I’m sure he meant no offense. 

Today I…

Began writing a little story.  A children’s story. Maybe someday I’ll share it with ya. It’s about counting your blessings.  It’s about knowing life changes and sometimes the stuff you want to hang onto the most gets lost in the shuffle of change.  I love the change.  It’s the shuffle I haven’t mastered yet.  So, following suit with you fellow bloggers in a month of thankfulness, here are the things I am grateful for even in midst of the shuffle. 

• I am grateful I don’t have a cold.  I hate stuffy noses and coughing.
• I am grateful for friends and sisters who let me chatter their ear off. 
• I am grateful for a husband who has a job. 
• I am grateful for the internet. 
• I am grateful for my calling teaching the 16/17 year old young women. 
• I am grateful for brown floors that don’t show the dirt. 
• I am grateful for bleach. 
• I am grateful for 80 degree weather in November.
• I am grateful that Jason’s hobby is collecting Hot Wheels and not real wheels.
• I am grateful for authors so I can read.
• I am grateful for modern medicine.
• I am grateful for Alpine Bakery so I don’t have to make bread myself.
• I am grateful. 

7 Brides for 7 Bros

This week for our musical I assumed I would be on my own.  7 Brides for 7 Brothers.  The kids didn’t seem interested so I took it into the office while I sewed costumes.  Halfway through I had Lainy and Jared squeezed into my office chair hushing me.   Even Jayce begs to watch it for our after dinner TV time. We have watched it 5 times together since.  Always at their request. 

Sedona memories

I grew up in So Cal and have never ventured south to Mexico. 

I have lived in AZ for 10 years and until a few weeks ago had never been to Sedona. 

We started out on the side of the road at an outdoor farmers’ market.  Whatever was in that field was probably very cool.

I know this looks like my mom, but it’s her twin sister, Julie.  Jared didn’t know twins were a reality until he took them in about 10 yards from each other.  I think his little head went back and forth between them about 10 times wondering how on earth she was in two places at once.  Once he realized she wasn’t Grammy, it only took all of 10 seconds to warm up to her!

We hit Montezuma's Castle along the way which was VERY cool.  I have a family of rule breakers and its a miracle that place is still in tact.  Jason wanted a close up shot, so he went close up.  Jared broke a chunk off of the (thankfully modern made) wall. 

Drewby had a grand time in my hair.  I swear I didn’t mind, though the picture would suggest otherwise.

I found Jared in the gift shop shaking this and trying to get the money out of the donations box.  Look at his gaze, the kid wanted that money.

Stopped off for a hike and found a walking stick bug.  Very cool. 

The rock formations were breathtaking and the weather was amazing.

Husband and 8 year old child.  Again, with the rule breaking, only this time I thought we might need a rescue chopper… They were a LOT higher than this picture looks.  Dummy.

How cute are they?  It is a still little weird seeing two of my mom. 

We ended the day going through the Church in the Rock.

Actually the day ended with milkshakes in this little place that had the ceiling covered in twinkly outer space lighting and alien life forms all over the place and creepy space music.  Weird.