Tree of Thanks

Last Thanksgiving I cut out a tree from cardboard and a handful of leaves and for family night we sat and wrote each thing we were thankful for on the leaves and it stayed up for a few weeks.   This year I found this tree at Michaels and bought a leaf punch and put it up when Autumn began.   I wanted to remember to be thankful a lot longer than just one night.  So, I hung a bag of leaves and a marker next to the tree and welcome anyone who enters my home to fill a leaf on my tree with what they are grateful for.  This was the first day we hung it, and it has slowly been riddled with words of thanks by many.  I hope to have a beautiful fall tree by Thanksgiving Day!

Small and Simple thing #1

Marjorie Pay Hinckley said:

Life is full of challenges.  Many of them involve balance and temperance.  Complete abstention may be easier than moderation.  It’s easier for me to completely abstain from smoking than to try and balance my day- a little for this, a little for that, a little for him, a little for her. 

Ralph Waldo Emerson expresses a majestic thought when he said: “It is easy in the world to live after the world’s opinion; it is easy in solitude to live after our own; but the great man is he who in the midst of the crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude.”

I have been struggling with balance in my life.  Trying to decide what I should try and balance in, or if I should completely abstain from it.  It was a few days ago that a little 5x5 inch purple book on my bookshelf seemed to call to me.  Sister Hinckley's book entitled ‘Small and Simple Things’.   In it I found this thought.  I read it and reread it and have repeated it to myself over the course of the last couple of days and each time it becomes more clear to me what a simple practice it is, and yet so difficult for me. 

San Francisco

Thank you to the Hambly’s for letting me bombard them for a day and being such great friends.   I love you guys.

I wish I didn’t live so far away from my dear friend! 

And I’m sorry, is she not just to die for?  I had the day to spend with these two ladies, and a part of the day to share with the boys of the fam, who are equally as wonderful!  (but not as photographed apparently!) 

Thank you to my parents for feeding me, housing me, and allowing me to tag along.  I love you guys.  

YES. That is the golden gate bridge.  I went over it.  Twice!  It was pretty cool. 

Ok, and the reason for this trip in the first place was to attend Jess and Tami’s Engagement party and I didn’t even bring my camera to it!  Sheesh. 

So, it was beautiful and filled with ALOT of aunts, uncles, cousins and friends.  They were all so kind and gracious.   Jess and Tami looked stunning-

(like Arabian Princess Barbie and Ken.  Seriously.) 

Ok, but without all the fluff.   Great company, great food, and glad to be home!

At the cracking of dawn

I put the kids to bed early last night.  Jayce was up at the crack of dawn at 5:30.   He came flying in holding a plate of goodies that the Phantom Ghost had left on our porch last night! (Thank you!)  I of course told him to go away and let me sleep.  It was when I finally (at 6:45) woke and found my kitchen in a bit of a mess that I realized the potential of my sweet children.  Jared had changed his own clothes (into another pair of jammies, but still) Jayce had gotten dressed, made a valiant attempt at making pancakes (with flour) and all were coloring at the table very quietly together.  Well, truthfully Jayce was coloring while the other two begged to help him.  I actually had a glimmer of hope that someday Jayce might be able fill the role of babysitter.   My dreams came crashing down when he came over and told me his pants felt weird and kept slipping down in the back.  

Jayce.  Your jeans are on backwards.

Very positive negative

 Conversation between Jayce and Wyatt:

Jayce:  My mom is going away this weekend with my dad.  She’s going there to get pregnant. 

Jayce and I had a little chat a week or so ago about babies.  I am guessing he has thought about it a bit since then.   We had another little chat tonight about mom not being pregnant and how it all happens.  (In case anyone is confused…  No, I am not pregnant, not planning to, not hoping to be.)

Morning recap

You know when you were younger and your alarm went off in the morning and you sleepily think of the reasons to stay in bed?  Then your brain goes through the previous days events and if something great happened that day (i.e. a kiss, a new job, chocolate muffins) it gets you out of bed and puts a hop in your step?  Well, this morning I did that for the first time in a long time.  And I wanted to remember my list.

1. New wedding ring on my finger (I lost mine grrr)
2. Got a new outfit for Jess’s engagement party
3. I’m going to San Francisco by myself for a whole weekend!
4. No heartburn! 

And the thought that gave me the most joy…

All of my children slept through the night.   No pee, no asthma, no coughing, no nightmares.  Sigh.  This HAS to be a good day! 

(And it’s only going to be 90 degrees!!! I love anything that isn’t triple digits.)

Stupid in love

Several years ago Jason and I were traveling together pre-children and saw a wonderfully memorable man on a street corner waving an advertisement poster.  He was enthusiastically dancing to his music, wore cut of jean shorts a tank top and had stringy long blonde hair under a backwards facing hat.   Jason mentioned how stupid he was.  I on the other hand, got caught up in his sheer enjoyment, leaned across Jason and out the drivers side window with flailing arms, and gave him a big ‘woo hoo!’   The dancing man responded appropriately with  ‘hang loose’.   And then Jason muttered words that became a staple in our ability to make one another laugh.  “You’re stupid too.”    If you spend enough time with us, you might catch us lovingly exchange these words. 

Duly noted

 

These black plate holders were supposed to be returned when they didn’t quite fit what I needed them for…   Except they kept disappearing.   

They seem to fit very well in the boys holsters.   As you can tell, they don’t stray far from their owners. 

Earlier I found this pop tart with a hole clean through.  I wonder if the 2 are connected somehow…

It begins and ends at home

While reading a fellow bloggers’ recent posting I had that deep set heavy feeling in my chest that I needed to get out on paper. As a parent I have learned the hard way (is there any other way to learn?!) to change a child's inappropriate, negative, or bad behavior. I will openly admit I was a yeller. And I tended to focus on the negative. I still have my moments, but have learned the damaging affects it has on a child. I have seen in 2 years time, my child change from a sad, angry, and frustrated child 80% of the time, to a happy, pleasant, loving child %90 of the time. And though it has now become the norm and the days fly by without much notice, there are moments when he cracks a joke or quietly ruffles his sisters hair with a smile, that my heart is filled with joy and such gratitude.

“To change child's behavior...HUGS, KISSES, COMPLIMENTS: make them feel good about the RIGHT behavior. Give extra attention, slow down, play with them.” (Thank you again Rach- you are on a roll this week!)

AMEN. It changed my life and his.

his lashes

He was nearly asleep.  He had both hands up at his face and was gently pulling on his eyelashes.   Jared of course, woke up as soon as the car stopped and ran inside.  It reminded me of Jayce when he was a baby.  I would rock him to sleep and he had the longest eyelashes, and they were often a little awry, so as he fell into sleep I would softly pull on them to straighten them out.   It became a nightly ritual and as he got older I found that whenever he went to bed or was sleepy his hands would go to his eyelashes and just pull lightly on them.   They mimic even in their sleep.

Jared made it to age 3. Barely.

Jared is 3.  I must admit as I sit here preparing my thoughts on this little boy, I heaved a huge sigh.   It’s been quite a messy year…  

• Nail polish
• cut Lainy’s hair and his
• baby powder
• desitin
• toothpaste and water ‘soup’
• lip gloss
• baby shampoo
• mud
• vegetable oil
• any and all food imaginable
• very expensive allergy drops
• stung by a scorpion
• my toothbrush on the dogs butt

And the list goes on.   But if I put all of these things somehow on a scale and balanced them against the amount of joy and love I have received from having him in my life, there is no contest.  He is worth every second.  Happy Birthday Jared.  I love you.

A ton of crap

Our home teachers came by today and we were discussing the topic of women and how many of us feel such inadequacy and often compare ourselves to other women and mothers and how we often think the grass is greener on the other side.   My friend Rachel (who’s blog is now private so no link sorry!)  posted an amazing quote on that subject a while back and it has stuck with me.

The grass is not, in fact, always greener on the other side of the fence. Fences have nothing to do with it. The grass is greenest where it is watered. When crossing over fences, carry water with you and tend the grass wherever you may be.  -Robert Fulghum

Steve Mullenaux one of my home teachers posed a question this afternoon,

“Do you know why the grass is always greener on the other side?”  

His answer held more truth than I was ready for.  

“Because there is a whole lot of crap over there to fertilize it with.”       

Building stability

If you’ve ever bought a tract home you know that the most exciting part (for me) is picking out your colors and features.  How excited I was that I could pick out my very own house!   First, how big?  Ok, there are only 6 floor plans to choose from, but still I get to pick! And picking the colors!  Of course, I had to stay within the parameters of their color scheme.  So, ok, I could pick from 2 greens, cream, tan, and brown.  But still I was picking my own colors!  And then to pick out my upgrades!   Here is the small list of what you are allowed.  It was glorious.  Or was it?  

I kind of have that same feeling about the nation these days.  I feel as if we are being told,  “Here are your freedoms.  You can say whatever you want… as long as it is on this list.  You can think and feel as you please, but you must stay within these few topics and ideals. Freedom to bear arms….   wait, scratch that- we’re taking that from you.  Freedom of religion, but only in a way that won’t infringe on, or hurt the feelings of another, maybe we should take that too.   Congratulations on your new found freedoms.”

I am aware of the negativity in this post, I am so tired of feeling like our America we know and love and are so blessed to be a part of, is being transformed and crumbling before our very eyes. 

4 years ago we began the plans for our current home.  No rules or exceptions unless it was for the safety and stability of the structure,  we drew it, redrew it, until it was what we wanted.   We painted it, and I wanted a different color so we re-painted it!   It took a while, it was frustrating, it was hard work and no it isn’t perfect.  But it was ours.   And this is how I feel about America.  The harder we work, the more we put into it, the better it will be.  Perfect?   Not by a long shot.  But worth it.  

Little boy stink

Remember this?  My baby is no longer so much a baby at nearly 3, and no longer has that piney fresh smell.  He has graduated into the stinky little boy phase.  I noticed it this morning as I begged for a snuggle and then snuggled him right to the bathtub.   Sniffff….  aaaah.   Lavender. (high on my favorite smells list- J&J lavender shampoo).  And a few short hours later as I crawled in bed next to him to wake him from his slumber…   the lavender was gone.  In it’s place…   stinky little boy.  Can I borrow someone’s baby? 

Domino affect

Days like today make me grateful for the hum drum run of the mill daily on goings.  (Minus the amazing Pedi and plate of brownies)

Driving and picking up 8 different shifts in 100 degrees made for a necessary few changes of clothing.  Shelley came and gave me a Pedi, (highlight of my day thank you!)  The other Shelli brought me a plate of brownies.  I am sure they were delicious,  my kids devoured all but 4 which I stashed on the counter for Jason I at a later time.   Instead, I forgot to lock up the stupid cat and she enjoyed them.  Lainy wanted her nails painted like mine so we did.  Jared later decided he wanted some painting done as well, but without help.  Everywhere.  White cabinets, knees, feet, hands, shirt.  I found that mess while I was making some semblance of a meal out of my most favorite whipping cream biscuits and a new chicken fingers recipe that looked and smelled divine.   Here’s how that went down…   As I opened a brand new gallon of apple juice, Lainy spilled water.  She grabbed a towel off the counter that was holding the plate of freshly baked biscuits.  I tried to catch (and miss) the plate and the apple juice went flying.  All over me.  By the time I returned from taking a sanity break, the chicken was ruined.  Sigh.  At least we had leftover pizza from last night to eat.

Dear friends

How often does a friend come along that you can preceed the term friend with "dear" or "best"? Not often for me. I think they are scarce so that we don't become lax and take them for granted. Truly it is a gift to have a dear or a best friend, and one does not have more than a handful in a lifetime. Whatever the case, I am grateful for those on my small list of dearest friends. These are women who I have leaned upon, or have leaned upon me, since that is what a friendship essentially means. You fill gaps when you are needed, and get your own gaps or in some cases, gaping holes filled by thier love and compassion. You cry with and cry for them. You laugh at, get laughed at, and laugh together. All of these friendships have seen and overcome trials, heartache, or sorrow. It is through this that the friendships are solidified. I am grateful for a Heavenly Father who is mindful of us always and uses his children to steady, uplift, and strengthen one another.

Losing it… finally

As a second grader, this kid has been waiting for years to lose a tooth.  He has stubborn teeth, and the only reason this one got knocked loose, was while opening opening a gel bottle with his teeth it slipped! 

A week or so later, Jason gave it a good yank and out it came.  Jayce quickly asked…   “Mom, do you have anybody coming over tonight?”  Nope.  “any clients or anything??”   I should have led him to a rooftop, he needed to do some shouting.  He made sure to smile as largely as possible to draw attention and possibly an inquiry of his newly spaced teeth. 

A little dinner conversation

Lainy:  We used to live in Aprica.

Mom: No lainy, California.  And it’s Africa.

Jayce: No, you used to live in that little corner state.  You know, the one on our map with an apple on it.

Mom: That’s Washington and only dad lived there.   They have really good apples there. 

Lainy: We’re going to move to Africa. 

Mom: No Lainy, we’re not.  You know the people who have very dark brown skin?  A lot of them are from Africa.

Jayce: No fair- they get the best apples there. 

Let’s begin again…

No vacancy… please no more vacancy

Make new friends, but keep the old

One is silver and the other is….

Gold.

Jason brought home a kitten last Sunday from a family out here and we just love her.  Growing up Jason’s family called Indian fry bread, ‘flapjacks’  which is where we got the name of our dog (who looks much better shaved).  And we thought we would follow suit with the cat.  We eat chili with flapjacks so we named her chili.

Of course the kids love her and don’t set her down unless specifically told to do so.   Lainy said the opening prayer in primary today and I was told it went something like this:

Dear Heavenly Father,  thank for my family, (etc)  please help us to be kind, and love each other…  (pause) and please bless the cat.  And please bless that if she jumps over the fence we will be able to get her back. In the name if Jesus Christ Amen.

Again.

I might as well just teach my children to cut hair since I can’t seem to keep them from doing it. 

See how happy I am to be cutting off her beautiful blonde hair?