A mothers panic

It finally happened. We knew it was inevitable. It was only a matter of time. And now we have to move. Jared is officially Arizonized. That's right, you heard me. It's like when you become part of a gang or a tribe. When you get stung by a scorpion, you are Arizonized. My poor little baby stepped on one of those awful creatures that can only have been sent from hell itself. I had a client (of course) and thank goodness Jason was home, he did enough panicking for the both of us. I went straight to my cupboard and made a mess looking for my french green clay. Yes, it's a must for any Arizona home. A friend gave it to me long ago and it works like a charm. I frantically mixed that stuff and drown Jared's tiny foot in it. He stopped crying! He of course whimpered for a half hour until he fell asleep. But it's been 2 hours, he is awake and feeling fine! Well, cranky, but who wouldn't be??

Mountain man on my porch

Tuesday morning I was doing my friend Laurie's hair, the doorbell rang and I ran to the door mumbling something about the kids locking themselves out again. I flung open the door and standing on my porch was a fully bearded long haired stranger... beneath his whiskers he was smiling. Before I had a chance to feel fear, I felt complete joy! My father in law was standing on my porch. He laughed that wonderful familiar laugh I hear so often in my own home from my sweet husband. The disbelief took a few moments to subside as we hugged and laughed, and I took him outside to see the kids. As soon as I announced grandpa was here, Lainy came running. I can't imagine she recognized him really, since he was all covered in hair, but none the less they embraced as if they were long lost friends. Laurie's son Bo followed suit and Joe got a big hug from him as well. (Thanks Laurie for waiting through all of this!) I called Jason, he didn't answer. We have a rule that if one of us calls the other once, and no answer, then twice right after, there is something important. Second call he answered. I told him he needed to come home. That everyone was alright, but he needed to come right home. (I wish I had sense enough to have grabbed my video camera) When Jason walked into the backyard where the kids were playing picnic with play food, he looked over at me like I was a lunatic. He said something about what was a strange man doing back here with his kids... We stood there a minute more until Jason had a chance to stop and really listen to the conversation going on underneath the slide. He couldn't get a view of the man's face being shielded by the slide. As soon as Jason heard that familiar twang, his head started to whip back and forth between my eyes and what sounded VERY familiar. He was next to his dad in 2 strides and I watched the reunion.

Joe had come to surprise his son for his birthday. It was so fun to have him here and talk and enjoy one another. Thank you so much Joe for your wonderful surprise. My kids sure love you, and miss you already.

Woe is me

 Monday morning.  Screaming coming from Lainy's room.   Jared banging on the door to get in.  Lainy intensely holding it closed from the other side.  I walk in, she breaks down in sobbing tears.  I hug her and ask what's wrong, she yells in exasperation, "The boogers won't come out of my nose!"   Her whole body slumps down as she continues to cry.  Again, "I just can't get them out of one side and I can't breathe!"   As I try not to giggle at her obvious discomfort,  I tell her it will go away soon enough, and I am so sorry for her stuffy nose.  I leave her to her misery and Jared takes over comforting her.   I hear her through sniffles and tears tell him she loves him and that he is her best friend, but to please leave so she can have some  'lonely' time. 

Slow down there fella

 Jayce was star student this week and I had the chance to go in and read the class a short story and watch Jayce tell his classmates all about himself.   Then the class has a few minutes to ask him anything they want to.  What's your favorite ice cream, your favorite animal etc.  Jayce did well when asked  "Who's your favorite person in the class?"  He said he couldn't choose.  I read them my most favorite children's book called 'Who will tuck me in tonight?'  By Carol Roth.  That was the day when I looked over at Jayce standing next to that huge chalkboard, reading his poster that I wondered when did he get so big?  And so smart, and when did the extra 50 freckles sprinkling his little nose show up?  

I was helping out with scouts last week and Jayce wanted so badly to participate so I let him hop in there on some of the activities.  Push ups, long jump, and learning how to start a race.

 

This is my good friend Robyn and she was teaching them the long jump. Realizing Jayce wouldn't be able to jump as far as the bigger boys she surprised him with...

 

A jump surpassing all other jumps!  She's the best. 

My sweet Jayce, slow down little man, you are growing up too fast for your mama!  I love you buddy.

BFF

I never want to forget what great friends these two are.  Jared came flying around the corner in Lainy's Jammies and I stopped in short and for a minute realizing it was Jared in front of me and not that Lainy had just cut off all her hair.                (Which she did last week, thankfully only a few in the front and she is getting better at blending)   

Jason later mentioned that Lainy and Jared were having a 'fashion show' trying on all of Lainy's clothes.  They have fun no matter what they are doing.  And a quarrel lasts only a moment (usually) since they go something like this:  Jared screaming for the giant exercise ball and Lainy sitting atop it calmly responding "Now let's sit and talk about this, I am sure we can work something out."  But they also create enough mischief together to shave a few years off my life.  This week:

• Requiring the need for a replacement head on my electric toothbrush when I heard them laughing while running behind my poor dog trying to 'get him on the butt'. 
• Making 'soup' with cups of water and toothpaste and stirring with toothbrushes. 
• Bathtub covered in mango lip gloss.  At least they got some on their lips...

                   

• Strawberries and sugar: Take a bite and chuck it across the room.  Swish and toss sugar until mom walks in screaming. 

I think my lists are getting shorter...  silver lining right?

Vocabulary lesson

There are a few words that when your kids learn to talk and they alter a bit to fit sometimes consonant-lacking vocabulary that you don't correct when they say them since they are so sweet.  Here are some of mine I want to remember.

Grnuckle - Granola bar.  Jayce started saying this very young and now all my children call them this.

Wormaid - Mermaid  (Lainy)

Spreeschool - preschool  (Lainy)

Wainy- Lainy  (Jared)

Seehide - Somehow this was derived from a form of hide and seek, it's where they pull all the cushions off the couch (at least 14 pillows!) and jump and hide in them.

Finding annoyance

While watching Finding Nemo tonight with the kids, I noticed a similarity between one of the characters and an American Idol contestant...  Deb (and Flo) from the fish tank gang, and Tatiana from AI have the same laugh.

Who knew?

Who Knew By PINK
You took my hand  You showed me how
You promised me you'd be around
Uh huh That's right
I took your words And I believed
In everything You said to me
Yeah huh That's right
If someone said three years from now
You'd be long gone I'd stand up and punch them out
Cause they're all wrong I know better
Cause you said forever  And ever
Who knew
Remember when we were such fools
And so convinced and just too cool
Oh no No no
I wish I could touch you again
I wish I could still call you friend
I'd give anything
When someone said count your blessings now
'fore they're long gone I guess I  just didn't know how
I was all wrong They knew better
Still you said forever And ever
Who knew
Yeah yeah
I'll keep you locked in my head
Until we meet again

And I won't forget you my friend What happened
If someone said three years from now You'd be long gone
I'd stand up and punch them out Cause they're all wrong and                           That last kiss I'll cherish Until we meet again
And time makes It harder I wish I could remember
But I keep Your memory You visit me in my sleep

Our children listen to us, even when they don't seem to be.   This song was on the radio today and Lainy was just sitting quietly in her seat, and halfway through the song said  "Mom?  She is sad because her friend died huh?"   Our children hear things we don't ask them to listen to.  They see us when we sit and pray on our own.  What books we choose to read and enjoy.  When I see some of the local leaders of our church and the spiritual giants they are, I want so badly to someday attain that closeness they have to the Savior. I often wonder what they read in their spare time.   What they listen to during their commute.  It comes back to what is good, better and best.  Pink is good, but not the best.  Ü   I really like her spunk and wildness, but I have to remind myself that those are not the things I need to fill the majority of my time with.  A splash of pink (at least the clean versions) is sometimes what we need. 

I'm not very good at it yet, but I know when I fill my life with the best  things, even though my trials don't go away, they are somehow rounded out and easier to overcome. 

Lainy's Plea

Dear Heavenly Father,

Thank you for this day.

Please help us to grow flowers and grass out back. 

Please bless our family. 

Please help us to be big...  like 5. 

Please help us to be saved.

(she means safe, but I'll take saved)

Oh, and please bless this food. 

In the name of Jesus Christ Amen. 

I love the prayer of a child.

Wise Nanner

I should begin by dedicating this to my oldest sister.   You might recall a previous post concerning the drama of my oldest child.  After that day I went on a hunt.  A search to find any and all info about parenting and how to 'fix' my child.  Shannon relayed a story that at the time she told me, wasn't very effective in helping me in my quest.  It was when I repeated the story to Jason, I realized it's high 'duh Julia' status.  It was about a mother who fostered a child who had a problem with lying.   Everything this child said or did was a lie or was leading up to a lie.  After 6 months or so, this mother brought the child back to social services and told him that she couldn't handle him anymore.  When asked why, she told him that she couldn't fix him.  The man asked how often the child had lied when he first came to her home.  Everyday. All the time.   And how often does he lie now?  Her answer was once every few weeks.  So often we forget to look at our children's progress since we are so programmed to jump on the misbehaviors.   I am a 'fixer' by nature and forget that a child isn't meant to be fixed, but loved and taught.

Balancing act

When life's business starts, blogging comes to a halt. I have been feeling a bit... lacking in certain areas of my life as of late. Motherhood topping that list. It seems as though when you add too many things to your palate of 'doings' instead of succeeding in all of them, they each seem to sag just a bit. Balance is the word I am looking for. A client recently asked me a thought provoking question about raising a daughter. She asked more or less how to teach a girl how to want to be self sufficient and support herself, but not take away from the desire to be a mother. Balance was all I told her. How can you teach balance without having learned it myself? I love being able to work, and feeling like I can tangibly see my efforts paying off. But I don't love it as much as I love my children. Work was creeping up and trying to overtake first place on my priority list. So, thank you to that client who unknowingly helped me start to get things back in balance and remind me of what needs to be tipping the scales and what should not be weighing me down.

Oh the drama!

Who knew that a 6 year old boy was capable of so much drama?  So much in fact, that I have blown my top a time or two in the last 2 days in response to just his speech!  I started to keep track of when he talked, how much of his vocabulary was said in whine mode.   ALL OF IT.  And how did my kid become such a control freak?  He seems to think he has the power and authority to tell the other children when they can look in stove window, which color cup they are allowed to use, if they can touch the couch as they walk by...  REALLY CHILD?  Where oh where has my happy boy gone?   This had better be a phase...

Fluish

I am a terrible sick person.  You give me a million things to do in a small amount of time and I can usually get it done and not be in too terrible of sorts.  But when I get sick, I turn into the biggest wuss.  A lot of times, men get painted as the babies when it comes to sickness.  Not my husband.  We got sick the same day and he took to it much better than I did.  I like to think I got hit harder than he did, since I took more down time than he did.   I moan and complain and 'woe is me' my way though the duration of the flu and from him I never hear a word of complaint.  Poor Jayce got the worst of it though,  the kid has hardly moved since yesterday.  So many friends offered to take Lainy and Jared this week, but for fear of spreading this yuck all around I thought it best they stay home.  Those two have been my little angels running around half dressed and completely disheveled.  They have taken it upon themselves to take care of each other.  Health (and cleanliness) will soon be returning to my home and I will be sure to remember to be grateful for it!

So long, Farewell.

I have never been a fan of dragging stuffed animals, or blankies around the house and trying to pry them from screaming hands so we can go to church or the store.  Somehow it happened with this one.  This vibrant pink and yellow worm grabbed as a last minute gift from Walmart has been attached to Lainy's side for 3 years and today Lainy said goodbye to her 'wormy'.  She cried.  I cried with her.   I knew that even though it was a stinky faded unrecognizable, half stuffed piece of fabric now, that she loved it and she was going to miss it.  I'm not such a mean mom that I would just take it away from her, it was in it's typical once a week wash cycle, it exploded. 

So, goodbye wormy, and thanks for the memories. 

London's Run

London was the daughter of a local family here battling cancer and the charity has continued for a few years since her passing, benefiting other children and their families in similar situations.   The race went well, the weather was chilly, but after the race began was perfect.  I beat my previous time by 3 minutes finishing in 58 minutes.  Running the first two miles is the toughest for me, while my body adjusts to the pace.  The hype up time and the anticipation fades about the 3rd mile...   into why why why am I doing this AGAIN?   Then by mile 5, exhaustion has made you delirious enough to think you need to push a little harder since you're almost done and the faster you get there the faster you finish.  Having friends train and run with you is where the joy is for me.  Although each time I have run that last stretch before crossing the finish line seems to make it all worth it too.  My mom surprised me at the finish line,  I hadn't realized until then how wonderful it is to have someone cheering you on as you come in.  Thanks mom! Mom snapped a couple pictures, and here is one as I am headed down the last stretch.  Two more weeks to rest up and run on Valentine's day for a charity benefiting a family in our old ward who has conjoined twins that share a heart and liver.  

 

Jill came tumbling after

When we decided on and drew up the plans for this house, I was very specific about a few things: A bar in the kitchen, a full front porch, a detached garage and a Jack and Jill bathroom for my kids rooms.  Well, we hardly use the bar, the front porch isn't used for all the nights I envisioned relaxing on the porch swing, and the detached garage is a bit of a pain not being attached to the house.   I had high hopes for the bathroom.  I pictured the kids taking turns in front of the mirror, one in the shower while the other got their hair done...   and mostly I had hopes that on the nights when one was scared, they would love being able to just sneak through the bathroom and crawl into bed and find comfort with a sibling.  Last night Lainy crawled into bed with me like she does on so many nights, and shortly thereafter headed back to her own bed after the confines between mom and dad was too much.   Shortly after that around 4 AM Jared started to cry in his room.   Sweet Lainy snuck through the bathroom, just like I planned and led Jared back through into her bed and they snuggled in.  I  smiled and peacefully went back to sleep. Until 15 minutes later at 4:15 AM I heard squeals of laughter.   Sooo not  what I had pictured.  

Presidential Introduction

Breakfast conversation this morning with Jayce...

J Hey mom, I know what's on the back of a nickel.  It's a white temple. 

M No, it's the 'White House'.  Who lives there?

J Oh, I know.  Joseph Smith. 

M  Umm, no.  The president of the United States.  Do you know his name?

J  George Washington.

M Well yes, he was the first president of the US.  And George Bush was our president until recently.  But we have a new president now.  His name is (gulp) Barack Obama.

J WHAT?  

Yeah, that was my first reaction too.

Man made

Jayce:  Boys can't make anything. 

Me: Like make what?  (Thinking we might be headed toward where babies come from, I stopped what I was doing to give him my full attention.)

J: Like, anything in the kitchen.  All they can make is hot pockets and noodles. 

Me: Hmm,  I don't think so. 

J:  Well, that's all I've ever seen boys make in the kitchen.

Team Spirit

Bus driver number 2 got a perm.  Everyday we see the same cars drive by, the same bus drivers stop and go, as we race to beat them before they turn in front of us, and cause an extra 4 minutes of stop and go driving to school.   We passed as we always do, bus driver #2.   Whoa.  She got a perm in her already very red, very curly hair.   The front window in a bus is pretty big, and she filled up her half pretty well.  

I like to watch people.   To wonder what goes on in their lives.  What caused her to perm her hair?  WHAT was her hairdresser thinking?  Does her husband like curly hair?   And then I thought,  hmm,  wondering sure is a quiet sneaky way to judge people.   I'm not judging, am I?  

We play this game in our family called "Your team".  Usually we find ourselves playing it in places like the airport, or the zoo.   We take turns picking people from the crowds and placing them on our imaginary team roster.   People like a boy with sparkly purple hair and wearing what looks to be shredded clothing, would quickly be called out 'your team'!   Or a woman (quite possibly a man) so muscle bound you find yourself flexing, is dubbed 'my team'!   Yes, even my mother finds herself sucked into this game.   Now, tell me, is this judging?   How can something so fun be a bad thing?

All chores are created un-equal

I have tried and failed so many times trying to 'equalize' chores, timeouts, rewards, and discipline between a 2, 4 and 6 year old.   In having a chat with my 6 year old today, a few things came out of my mouth that I think are noteworthy.  When he asked,  "Why do I have to clean it all by myself?  They played with it too."   I started to tell him because I said so, and took a different approach. 

"You're 6, he's 2.  Your chores, and expectations match your age.  It seems unfair, but you just happened to be born first, so you get to the hard chores first.  When he is 6 he will do them too." 

Next,  in chatting with him about his attitude, which was significantly nasty this morning, I told him he would have to earn his privileges.  He nodded, and  I realized,  why would a 6 year old know what earning a privilege is?   So, in effort to explain it simply to him I said,  "You gotta do good things to get good things."  Genius I know.  Such is life.